Monday, February 27, 2006
by Richard E. Noble
WARNING!!! This is an eighteen inch piece of string, and it could be dangerous to your unsupervised child.
Any child over one foot in height could attempt to use this string as a jump rope and possibly break their neck.
Under no circumstances should a butcher knife ever be tied to the end of this string.
If this string is soaked in water and then frozen, it could be used by your child to poke another child’s eye out.
Your unsupervised child could dip this string in melted wax, or lighter fluid or other flammable(or inflammable) material and then use this coated eighteen inch string as a wick for a stick of dynamite or other explosive.
Your unsupervised child could use this eighteen inch string to strangle a younger brother or sister to death.
Your child could also use this string to sneak into YOUR room late at night and strangle you and your mate (or present companion) to death also.
Your child could dip this string in rat poison; eat it, and then die.
Your child could try to shove this string up another companion’s nose with a kitchen fork, and seriously injure that individual, and possibly damage your fork.
Your unsupervised child could tie this string around his leg cutting off circulation. If not detected within a reasonable period of time, this condition could lead to the amputation of your child’s limb.
This string could be wadded up, then soaked in molten lead, and after cooling stuffed into the mussel of your black powder rifle and used by your unsupervised child to kill the family cat.
A needle could be attached to this string and then it could be used by your child to sew up his own rectum, or the rectum of a sibling or close friend.
To whom it may concern.. YOUR UNSUPERVISED CHILD IS A THREAT TO US ALL … PLEASE WATCH THE LITTLE SUCKER WILL YOU, FOR GOD’S SAKE!
P.S. Do us all a favor and get yourself ‘fixed’ will you please. You obviously can’t
handle this child, what in the world would you do with another one.