By Richard E. Noble We pulled into the parking lot of one of our local area grocery stores. I won't say which one or what part of the County. I know my editor doesn't need the aggravation. The large windows were all plastered with this week's sales. I read the signs and was surprised to find that each and every one of the items on sale was on our grocery list. "How do you like that!" I said to Carol. "All our stuff is on sale this week." We wandered around picking out our vital necessities - being sure to get all the specials that were advertised on the windows. When the girl at the cash register began ringing up our groceries, we both noticed that she didn’t ring up the sale items at the sale price but at the regular price. My wife immediately ordered a halt to the operation - which is always very embarrassing. Other people are behind you waiting, some holding one container from the deli - probably on their ten minute lunch break. So who wants to hold things up? "That item is on sale," my wife squeaked softly. The girl beeped the item to check her computer prices. "It doesn't say that here," she explained. "It might not say it there," I offered. "But it says it on that big six foot poster you have taped to that window over there." "Oh," she said. "You can't go by those signs. They never remember to take them down after the sale is over. Those sales ended yesterday." "Really," I said. "Well, I can help you out there," I said. I went over to each window and I ripped down each and every sign. Within a moment or two there was a young manager or assistant manager hovering next to me. "Excuse me sir? Is there something wrong?" "No, nothing's wrong. Your cashier just told me that all of these sale items that my wife and I diligently collected around this store are not actually on sale this week. She said that these are last week’s sales and you folks just didn't have time to take them down. Since nothing annoys me more than buying things on sale that aren't really on sale, I thought that I would give you guys a helping hand and take all of these old signs down for you." After I got all the signs torn down and stuffed into an empty shopping cart, I went back over to the cash register and paid our bill. The manager followed delicately behind me. My wife and I smiled and thanked everybody as we gathered up our groceries and trucked on out of the store. As we were departing I heard the manager ask the girl behind the register, "Did you tell that man that those sale prices on the window had expired?" "Yeah," she said. "They don't expire until tomorrow," he informed her. "Oh," she said. Not too long after that embarrassing incident, I saw a special on TV. The program was explaining how department stores and grocery chains are making themselves millions every year by "neglecting" to coordinate their cash register computers with their on floor (or on window) sale prices. It seems that the vast majority of customers never notice. The customer sees that an item is marked on sale and they assume that when they get to the register they will be charged accordingly. Not so. Now far be it from me to suggest that any of our little groceries stores or even our area department stores would do such a thing intentionally. BUT, whenever my wife and I buy anything that is marked to be on sale, we now put it separately in our shopping cart. We present all sale items to the cashier in one cluster. Almost always, there are discrepancies. Occasionally the cashier will just make the appropriate change herself. But more often than not a price check is required or someone has to be called. I am beginning to think that this may not be an accident. I hate to be such a skeptic. A hundred years ago when I worked as a stock boy in a busy metropolitan grocery store, it was our responsibility to change the prices on all sale items on our aisle the evening before the sale. We accomplished this with wipe cloths, ink pads, hand stampers and stick on tags. It wasn’t just a matter of going to a central computer and pressing a few buttons. We did it every week – no problem. What’s the excuse today?
Richard Noble is a freelance writer and has been a resident of Eastpoint for 30 years. He has written and published 5 books. All 5 are listed on Amazon.com. If you would like to stock his books in your store or business he can be contacted at email@example.com.
Books by Richard Edward Noble. Click on covers below for more info and purchasing instructions.
Classic Tragic Novel
Don't Laugh - This Could Have Been Your Life
Funny stories and some strange characters.
Monkey Dishes and Cocktail Fawks
My Harrowing days in the restaurant business. Great Read.
It's a Long Story
Long Short Fiction - Great stories!
Bloggin' Be My Life
"Bloggin' be My Life" contains a selection of some of my more popular Hobo Philosopher blogs.If you enjoy reading this blog, you should love Bloggin' Be My Life.
It's All About Love
It's All About Love is ... all about love. This is the 2nd book of poetry from The Bard From Chelmsford off Arlington. Every poem in this book comes with a prose introduction. If you enjoy poetry this is a simple choice. Have fun!
A Little Something
Traditional poetry from The Bard From Chelmsford Off Arlington with some poignant prose introductions. If you enjoy any type of poetry, you will enjoy this volume. Thanks.
Talking To Myself
This is my third book of poetry.
Bits and Pieces
The Hobo Philosopher - My first book using the Hobo Philosopher brand. Featuring a variety of writing styles and ideas. Look for the Thoughtful Hobo on the cover.
A Baker's Dozen
The Hobo Philosopher: My Second book of Fiction, Creative Non-Fiction and Short Stories. All varieties of short stories - lots of laughs!
Cat Point - and Them Dang Oyster People
Cat Point is the sequel to "The Eastpointer." Both books contain humorous tales about life in a fishing community on the Florida Panhandle. Lots of laughs.
Won 1st Place award for humor in 2007 from Florida Press Association. More wit, wisdom and humor from the yet to be world famous author, R.E. Noble
A Summer with Charlie - Lawrence
Fiction - Salisbury Beach, Lawrence, Mass. Featured in Merrimack Valley Magazine July /Aug. issue 2010
Travel, Humor, Commentary on migrant farm work and illegal immigration still very pertinent today.
"Just Hangin' Out Ma"
Thank God for the Street Corners of Lawrence, Mass. Anecdotes and humorous escapades about growing up in an industrial mill town in the 40s,50s and 60s.
This is the sequel to "Just Hangin' Out, Ma"
That Old Gang of Mine
This is # 3 in my Lawrence Hometown series. The series is about growing up in the 40's, 50's and 60's in an industrial mill town. Sorta like a Huck Finn goes to vist Uncle Ralph, the bus driver, who lives in a big, rundown city. Lots of fun.
Come On-A My House
This is # 4 in my Lawrence Hometown series.The old homested at 32 Chelmsford ST is pictured on the cover..
Down By The Old Mill Stream
# 5 in the Lawrence My Hometown series.
Standing on the Corner is # 6 in the lawrence My Hometown series.
The old Howard Playstead on Lawrence St.
Eat, Drink and Be Merry
# 7 in the Lawrence my Hometown series.
Honor Thy Father and Thy Mother
Classic tragic novel written from child's perspective. Deals with abuse, poverty, unemployment. Pulls no punches.
Noble Notes on Famous Folks
Humorous, satirical notes on everybody from Constantine to Bill Clinton. Inspiration: Willy Cuppy.
America on Strike
History - documented survey of labor strikes in America
Mein Kampf - An Analysis of Book One
Who are the American Nazis - the Liberals or the Conservatives?
MY NAME IS RICHARD EDWARD NOBLE. I AM A FREELANCE WRITER AND I HAVE PUBLISHED 12 BOOKS:"THE EASTPOINTER" - SELECTIONS FROM AWARD WINNING NEWSPAPER COLUMN - "A LITTLE SOMETHING" - POETRY WITH PROSE -"HONOR THY FATHER AND THY MOTHER" - A NOVEL ABOUT GROWING UP IN THE NEW ENGLAND MILL TOWN OF LAWRENCE, MASS, "HOBO-ING AMERICA" - A WORKINGMAN'S TOUR OF THE U.S.A. - "A SUMMER WITH CHARLIE" - THE STORY OF A YOUNG SAILOR'S LAST DAYS AT SALISBURY BEACH, "NOBLE NOTES ON FAMOUS FOLKS" - HUMOROUS ANECDOTES ON FAMOUS FOLKS IN HISTORY,
"AMERICA ON STRIKE" HISTORY BOOK - A SURVEY OF LABOR STRIKES IN AMERICA; "A BAKER'S DOZEN" A BOOK OF HUMOROUS SHORT STORIES; "JUST HANGIN' OUT, MA" - GROWING UP IN THE 40'S, 50'S AND 60'S IN LAWRENCE, MY HOMETOWN, "TENEMENT DWELLERS" - SEQUEL TO JUST HANGIN OUT, MA; MEIN KAMPF - ANALYSIS OF BOOK ONE - HISTORY. CAT POINT - AND THEM DANG OYSTER PEOPLE - SEQUEL TO THE EASTPOINTER
All 12 BOOKS ARE AVAILABLE ON AMAZON.COM, BARNES AND NOBLE AND OTHER INTERNET SOURCES OR FROM NOBLE PUBLISHING. ALL 12 OF MY BOOKS ARE NOW ON KINDLE AT BARGAIN PRICES TOO. IF YOU WOULD LIKE MORE INFORMATION ABOUT DISCOUNTS AND SPECIAL OFFERS E-MAIL ME. MY EMAIL IS ON MY PROFILE PAGE.